Why am I always just the friend?
In today’s blog I answer another member’s dating problem.
How do you avoid the dreaded “friends zone”?
Dear James,
I hope you can help me. I don’t seem to have a problem getting dates but I always seem to end up in the “just a friend” category after. We’ll have a good time and I’ll be looking forward to seeing them again, only to be blown out. They’ll tell me I’m a lovely guy but they just seem see me as a friend. What can I do about this?
G
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Dear G,
Many thanks for your email. It’s very easy to get stuck in the friends zone if you don’t make your interest clear.
I’m going to show you how to move on from friend to boyfriend.
1) Be flirty. You need to try and escalate things physically. Stay clear of anthing creepy of course, but you do have to lightly touch her every now and again. This can be as simple as touching her arm or giving her a quick hug at the start of the date. Once you are sure she is comfortable, step it up a little. Perhaps you can give her a high five or hold her wrist while you pretend to be interested in her watch.
2) Be a a Man. Women need to respect your masculinity if they want to date you. This means paying the bills, being confident and not chasing them round like a lovesick puppy.
3) Be Romantic. If you want her to feel romantic towards you then you need to set the scene. Take her to romantic places, buy her small gifts and treat her like she’s the most important person you’ve ever met. If she feels special then you’ll be making her feel good too – meaning she will want more of it!
4) Make your interest clear. How will they know you like them if you are too nervous to tell them? Bite the bullet and make your move. If you delay it she’ll assume you only want to be friends and it’s very hard to turn it round.
5) Remember all is not lost. Many friendships do eventually turn into relationships and can often be longer lasting because of it.
Good luck!
James Preece – The Dating Guru
www.asiansinglesolution.com
August 6th, 2010 at 11:44 pm
What about the opposite…what if you find yourself as a female…. after a few dates they seem to ‘lose interest’ say you’re a lovely girl etc but don’t see thing going anywhere long term? Thats happened to me a few times