Who is calling?

You might think that if you send out enough messages, with your personal contact info, you will get results.


For many reasons we advise against this. Here are the top 5 reasons why it doesn’t work.

1. Speaking to someone you know is hard enough, so why would anyone call a total stranger without even a cursory online chat first? Men might but women won’t.

2. If you’ve given out your number too early, you won’t know who is calling. Imagine the scene.

“Hi, its me from the site”

Sorry, who is calling?

Sorry, who is calling?

“er….. sorry, who? Which site? Please just hold the line while I check your profile.”

Embarrassing isn’t it? and that is if they call, which they probably won’t, so you’ve blown your chances.

3.  Ladies in particular may not want to reveal personal information like a phone number without getting to know you online first. Once the other person has your details there is no going back. Ultimately, you cannot avoid this, but at least get to know a little about them first.

4. Just giving out your number in the first message might make you appear unselective or indiscriminate at best, or desperate and lazy at worst.

5. If someone emails you outside the site, then like point 2 above, it is much harder to know who is messaging you and to keep track of who is who.

Our advice would always be to chat online first. You can use the messaging system, or our live chat feature. You can always agree a time to chat online, at a time that suits you both.

Make it easy for the other person by asking short simple specific questions about them or something in their profile.

If you are nervous about giving your number out, then register for a personal number. This is an 07 number that you can have diverted to your mobile. Some sites charge a nominal fee for this such as UK2numbers.co.uk other sites might be free. Just remember if you dial out your number is going to be displayed, unless you type 141 in front of the number. Once you feel comfortable you can swap proper numbers but it doesn’t hurt to keep your number private the first time you chat.

Remember – use the site for messages, that is what it is there for.

Paul Ergatoudis

Dating Expert and Director at www.AsianSingleSolution.com

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