The Asiansinglesolution.com team
would like to wish you a very happy Holiday Season.
We hope you have a lovely break and enjoy the last few days of 2018.
The office will be closed over Christmas but we’ll still be providing support and answering emails.
James, Paul, Meera and the Team
www.asiansinglesolution.com
The holidays are a great time to spend with your closest family and reconnect with distant relatives. You get to see all the faces you haven’t been able to see since the last holiday. There are gatherings everywhere. People to meet. Faces to remember. It’s fun, but it can also be chaotic.
If you’re just starting a new relationship, the holidays can be really tricky. After all, there are two families to plan around. You want to visit your family for the holidays. Your new partner probably wants to visit their own family. At the same time, you also want to enjoy the holidays together. It’s hard enough to have the conversation with yourself. How do you talk to your new partner about their plans?
The first thing you need to do is get all the variables out in the open. This is done by asking your partner what his/her plans are for the holidays. It is awkward, but you will have to ask your new partner if he/she wants to spend the holidays with you. If the answer is no, your problems are solved.
Of course, you may be offended by the fact that your partner doesn’t want you to meet his/her family. Keep in mind that your partner could feel that it is too soon to introduce you to his/her family. Your partner may want to introduce you more gradually or to a smaller group first. You’ll need to be patient with your partner and respect this decision.
If your partner does want to spend the holidays with you, then you’ll need to figure out how you can both get what you want. Ask your partner the details: Where would you be going? Who would you be seeing? How long will you be staying? Ask yourself the same questions and share the information with your partner. There are likely going to be conflicts. Try and be patient with each other as you work through those conflicts together. Communication is the key to a smooth holiday plan!
If both of your families are located in the same place, your plans will be significantly easier to arrange. Of course, there will still be the question of where you are eating the traditional holiday meal. You don’t want to eat at both locations, even if they are at different times. If they are different days, you’re set! Alternatively, you can always arrange to meet each others families, then go your separate way for the meal. After you’ve enjoyed the meal and time with your family, you can get back together for the later evening. If that isn’t realistic, you can spend the following day together to make up for lost time.
Along with open communication, you need to be flexible about your plans. Again, the holidays are stressful and you don’t want to add to that stress. Being open about the time you spend together. You will be able to make it work as long as you’re open, flexible, and patient.
When you’ve known someone for a long time, it’s usually easy to buy them a gift for the holidays. You know enough about what they like and don’t like. But if you’ve recently started seeing someone new, you’re likely at a loss for the perfect gift. After all, you don’t know much about each other yet. You’re not sure of their hobbies or interests. You have no idea what they would want for the holidays. You don’t want to ask because it puts them on the spot. You can always opt out of getting your new partner a gift, but you want to make a good impression, right?
This is your guide for buying your new partner the perfect holiday gift:
You can tell a lot about a person from their social media accounts. Look at the type of content they post, especially when it comes to Facebook posts. People often share videos or make comments about products they wish they owned themselves. You can use that to find something your new partner will adore. With Instagram, you can see the type of hobbies your new partner is interested in. You can also see what your new partner already has and hopefully avoid buying a repeat gift. Unfortunately, you won’t be able to use this trick if you haven’t exchanged social media information.
When it comes to a new partner, you don’t want to get crazy with gift-giving. That means you don’t want to buy them a pile of presents and you don’t want to spend a fortune on a single gift. You can usually get away with something simple when it’s your first holiday together. If you do opt for an expensive and dazzling gift, you may scare off your new partner. He/she may believe you are moving too fast with the relationship.
It is never a bad idea to get your partner something with his/her name on it. This is a fun gift idea that works for any occasion. It’s rarely expensive, but always appears thoughtful. Of course, you need choose a gift that falls into your partner’s interests/hobbies. If you choose something random, your partner may think you aren’t serious about the relationship or getting to know them. Opt for something you have seen them use or you believe would be useful.
This gift idea depends on how long you’ve been seeing each other. If you’ve only gone on a few dates, this idea won’t work. If you’ve been seeing each other for a few weeks or even months, this is a great idea. You can choose a gift that symbolises your first date. You can choose a gift that represents something you both have in common. This gift doesn’t have to be store-bought either. A handmade relic of the relationship may be significantly more sentimental to your partner.
Of course, the best way to choose a gift for your new partner is by listening to them. Since the holidays are approaching, they will likely drop a few hints about what they want. If you pay attention to these subtle clues, you’ll be able to get them the perfect gift!
If you haven’t got a partner yet, it’s just a case of sending out some some messages on our dating site and going out on some dates. There’s still time!
www.asiansinglesolution.com
With gleam of Diyas
And the Echo of the Chants
May Happiness and Contentment Fill Your life
Wishing you a very happy and prosperous Diwali!
James,Paul, Meera and the Asian Single Solution Team
We were very pleased to sponsor the Brit Asian TV Music Awards last Saturday, 6th October.
This was our 5th years sponsoring the awards as we think it’s important we support the industry. The event was packed full of celebrities and was a very glamorous ceremony.
It was an amazing night and our lovely host Stephanie presented the award for “Best Bollywood Track” This was won by Dilbar – Dhvani Bhanushali, Ikka Singh, and Neha Kakkar
The other winners of the night were:
Best DJ: DJ Frenzy
Breakthrough Act: G. Sidhu
Best Lyricist: Sidhu Moose Wala – So High
Best Music Video Director: Sunny Dhinsey – Udaarian
Best Male Act: Guru Randhawa
Best Non-Traditional Asian Act: Steel Banglez
Best Female Act: Jasmine Sandlas
Music Producer of the Year: Vee
UK Act of the Year: JK
Album of the Year: CON.FI.DEN.TIAL – Diljit Dosanjh
Music Video of the Year: Udaarian – Satinder Sartaaj
Track of the Year: Lahore – Guru Randhawa
Special Recognition: Raghav
Outstanding Achievement: Panjabi MC
Lifetime Achievement Award: Arif Lohar
Congratulations to everyone who won and well done to the organisers on such a wonderful event. We can’t wait for next year!
Asian Single Solution
We are very proud to announce that once again we will be sponsoring the Brit Asian TV Music Awards.
We are sponsoring the “Bollywood Track of the Year.”
The awards are dedicated to celebrating talent from the Asian entertainment world. The annual award ceremony takes place at the prestigious Park Plaza hotel located in the heart of Central London on Saturday 6th October.
The evening will be televised so watch out for us presenting the award!
May Lord Ganesha shower you with blessings and happiness.
Wishing you all a very Happy Ganesh
The Asian Single Solution Team.
There are people out in the world who avoid commitment when dating. They aren’t interested in settling down. Maybe they want to travel the world and meet different people. Maybe they are too focused on advancing their career to think about love.
For these people, short term dating is a choice they have made. But there are others who have had the choice made for them by their insecurities. These people are commitment phobes, but they often don’t even know it!
If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you are one of those people. Consult the list below and see how many of these traits you can identify in your own life:
You are always second-guessing yourself.
You’re indecisive, especially when meeting new people.
You think about the end of every relationship.
You have hidden insecurities and are afraid of being left behind.
You worry about someone accepting you for who you are.
You always end up in the worst relationships.
You avoid sharing personal details about yourself with a new partner.
You avoid talking about your past, even if it was “normal”.
You tend to ghost on other people.
You have a rotation of people you’re communicating with.
You are more comfortable with short relationships.
You tend to nitpick about unimportant things.
You are always looking for a reason to end the relationship.
You tend to self-sabotage.
You always make jokes about how relationships are a waste of time.
You have been called out by friends or family.
You have commitment issues in other aspects of your life.
If any of these traits resonate with you, there is a good chance you are afraid of committing to someone. If you are afraid of commitment, you may be wondering how you can overcome that fear. After all, no one wants to be alone forever or move from relationship to relationship. If you’re ready to accept that you’re afraid of commitment, you’re ready to make the changes too.
The key is to take small steps and make gradual changes. Change isn’t easy for anyone, even if you want to believe you’ll be the exception. If you try to rush the process, you’re going to fail and end up back at square one. Instead, try pacing yourself. If something feels unnatural, don’t do it. You’re also going to want to communicate your fears with your current partner, especially if they are the reason you want to make these changes. Your partner should know what you are going through so that he/she can be supportive of the process. Otherwise, you may feel your efforts are for nothing.
The first thing you need to do is figure out the reason behind your fear of commitment. Are you afraid of being left behind? Are you afraid no one will love you for who you really are? Are you afraid of investing time into something that is going to end? Be honest with yourself about these hesitations. That is the only way you will be able to work through these issues. Often, identifying them helps you to realize they aren’t valid insecurities and allows you to move on with your life.
If you continue struggling, get in touch and our resident Dating Coach might be able to help!
www.asiansinglesolution.com
Relationships are up and down. Even the best relationships still had some negative aspects. This is typical in the dating world. It can also lead people to look for something that goes above and beyond the typical dating experience. Not everyone is looking for their soul mate, but those who are searching tend to put a great amount of effort into the search. If you’re one of those people, it helps to know what you’re looking for. Of course, there is no right or wrong answer for how soul mates interact. The list below is merely a guideline that suggests you’ve found “the one” your soul has been looking for.
1. You are empathetic towards their pain, both physically and emotionally.
Soul mates often feel the pain of one another. If your partner stubs your toe, you may not feel anything. But if your partner loses someone close to them, you’ll experience their loss. If your partner were to get into an accident in the middle of the night, there is a chance you would wake up from a dead sleep, knowing something was wrong. This is the type of connection that soul mates share with one another.
2. You have never met someone who gets you so perfectly.
Your partner understands your jokes and your quirks. The two of you can talk about anything and everything. You may even feel like they physically fit you better than anyone else. Their likes and dislikes are similar to yours and you can share almost everything. You recognize the flaws in them, but see them as quirks instead. They feel the same way about you. The two of you just seem to fit together like peanut butter and jelly.
3. You communicate properly with your partner.
This doesn’t mean the two of you never argue about anything. Even soul mates can get into disagreements. Communicating properly means that a minor disagreement will not become a fight or escalate into something that can’t be repaired. Soul mates find it easier to talk to each other than to anyone else, even when it’s an uncomfortable topic.
4. You are completely comfortable silence.
Although you can communicate well and you talk about everything, the two of you are also comfortable with silence. You can sit together in a room and not feel compelled to fill the silence. You simply enjoy being around each other. You enjoy the vibes. This also means you don’t feel the need to talk constantly when you’re not together. In fact, you can probably go a few days without contacting each other at all and trust that everything is fine.
5. You feel like you’ve found your soul mate.
If you’re intuitive, there’s a good chance you already know you’ve found your soul mate. Something just tells you that this is the right person for you. Maybe you can’t find the words to explain the way you’re feeling. It’s just something you know in your gut. When you find your mind wandering, you find yourself thinking of this person and you’re filled with joy and content. This type of feeling goes beyond love. It means you’ve found your soul mate.
We recently ran a competition to win £200 and tickets for the opening night Gala of the London Indian Film Festival plus after party.
Our lucky winners were Nandita C and her friend Monsura M.
The festival was an amazing success and everyone had a wonderful evening.
Thank you to everyone who entered.
James, Paul, Meera and the Team
www.asiansinglesolution.com
AsianSingleSolution.com are yet again, major supporters of the London Indian Film Festival which begins on 21 June.
LONDON 21 – 29 JUNE 2018
BIRMINGHAM 22 JUNE – 01 JULY 2018
MANCHESTER 29 JUNE – 01 JULY 2018
Please review the programme here or at londonindianfilmfestival.co.uk
As a Dating Coach, it concerns me every time I see someone writing a negative online dating profile.
It’s a terrible thing to do but still surprisingly common, despite our best efforts to teach people they shouldn’t be doing it!
So what exactly is a “negative” profile and what’s so bad about it?
A negative dating profile is one that talks about all the things you don’t want. Typical comments might be things like:
“I can’t believe I’m doing this”
“No timewasters please”
“Only contact me if you have a photo”
“Don’t bother to contact me if you aren’t serious”
“I don’t know what to write here”
“If you aren’t in the UK don’t bother”
Believe it or not, these type of statements appear in an awful lot of profiles. The problem is that they make you sound really miserable, jaded and unlikely to be fun on a date. Nobody likes a negative nancy so you should avoid these at all costs. If people think you are like that then they won’t be drawn to you and won’t want to spend time with you.
It’s much better to focus on positive things and talk about the lovely things you have to offer. It’s not just about what you are looking for, but what the other person wants too. It’s a two way street and you have to remember that. Otherwise it can come across as demanding or downright rude. I’m sure you don’t want anyone to think that of you!
Try and write things like this instead:
“I’m excited to see what might happen on this site”
“I’d love you to contact me if you like what you’ve read”
“If you are also looking for a serious relationship then it would be great to hear from you”
“Helping others and Keeping Fit are two of the things that make me happy”
If you’ve written anything negative in your profile then I strongly suggest you take this out and write something more lighthearted and friendly instead. You’ll have a much better success rate and many more replies to your messages.
Happy Dating!
James Preece
Dating Coach for Asian Single Solution.
You may be at a point in your relationship that feels flat. There’s no more excitement. You’re starting to feel distant. Intimacy has slowed or completely stopped. Internally, you may be panicking. At the same time, you’re hesitant to bring this up with your partner. Naturally, no one wants to have to say “this isn’t working”. It often leads to an argument because it sounds like the prelude to a break-up scene. If that’s not your goal, it’s all in the wording.
If the drift is minimal, it’s easy enough to get things back on track without even mentioning it to your partner. Of course, a healthy relationship means you should always feel comfortable talking to your partner. If you feel like the issue might be serious, you need to sit down and talk about what is going on. It could be something on both ends or something you’ve overlooked. It’s possible your partner isn’t feeling the relationship anymore. It’s more likely they are just going through something personal.
When you’re faced with any of these issues, here are 5 quick ways to strength your relationship:
Set aside alone time
While you might spend a good deal of time together, this is different. This refers to time without distractions or interferences. No TV or cellphones. No reading a book or magazine. Just spending time together. You may think this sounds boring, but use your imagination! You could play a board game together or simply talk. Use the time alone to express your concerns or to get to know your partner. There is always something new to learn, even if you’ve been together 40 years.
Do something different
Instead of sticking to the same routine, try spicing it up. This can be as simple or as complicated as you’d like. You could go to a restaurant instead of staying in for dinner. Go on a date, like you’re meeting for the first time. Go for a walk together in a park you haven’t been to in years. It doesn’t matter. Anything outside of your typical routine is going to be different enough. After all, relationships can feel stagnant simply because the routine has drained you. By switching up what you’re doing, you can bring the essence of youth back. Another great idea in this category is signing up for a class, maybe cooking or crafts. As long as it’s something you’ll both enjoy!
Celebrate each other
Naturally, you celebrate when your partner has accomplished something like a promotion or a raise. As important as it is to recognise big accomplishments, you need to learn to recognise the little ones as well. You can do this by saying thank-you for small house tasks. You can buy random inexpensive gifts or treats to show your partner that you’re thinking about them. You can get creative with dozens of ways to show your appreciation for your partner. This is the same as celebrating them. Remember that every day with your partner is a gift.
Get physical
Too often relationship problems are caused by a lack of physical intimacy. While that shouldn’t the base of any relationship, it is definitely one of the walls of the foundation. A healthy relationship always has a form of physical intimacy. This doesn’t always refer to intercourse. You can get physically intimate by holding hands, kissing, tender embraces and cuddling up on the couch to watch TV. Physical intimacy is really any kind of physical closeness. Every relationship needs that.
Communicate
This is a big issue in most relationships. Communication often stops feeling essential as you get used to the routine. You talk all the time about dinner, work, weather or upcoming events. But you don’t dive into the “how are you, really?” questions. Learning to communicate isn’t as quick as the other options, but it’s equally important. Without communication, any relationship is doomed to failure. This refers to learning to how to have an argument as well. Obviously, there are going to be issues that arise. You don’t need to avoid arguments in a relationship, you need to learn to communicate the real issue to get working on a solution.
Of course, every step you take in a relationship should be met half-way! If you’re not feeling valued as an equal or you feel you’re doing everything, it’s time to have a more serious talk.
James Preece
Dating Coach for AsianSingleSolution.com
Every relationship reaches the point where you have to ask: Is it time to introduce them to your inner circle? After all, you’re not going to date someone without ever introducing them to friends and family. At the same time, you don’t want to introduce every single potential partner to your friends. You could overwhelm your friends or even build resentment. If you’re moving too fast with your relationships, you could end up facing that problem. If you feel that’s the case, take a step back from dating and take a look at why you might be rushing your relationships.
Here are a few tips to help you introduce your partner to your friends:
When you’re making the introductions, less is more. Don’t invite your partner to a party with 25 of your closest friends. Start with brunch and maybe 2 of your friends. This gives your partner the chance to get to know the people in your life, while also giving your friends the chance to get to know your partner. Intimate gatherings are ideal for initial meetings. This way, your partner will be happy to see a familiar face at that 25 guest party. It saves both of you from becoming overwhelmed with the interaction. Plus, if the relationship falls apart soon after, you only introduced this partner to a few friends.
It’s not easy to choose the right timing to make introductions. That’s because there is no right or wrong answer. There isn’t exactly a rule book, either. It’s different for everyone. Your time line might work with this partner, but be too early with the next. You really have to gauge every relationship individually and decide what is best with each partner.
Generally, premature introductions aren’t wise. There are a few cases where an early introduction has had benefits. Such as the partner didn’t like the friends, ultimately deciding the fate of the relationship. Other examples may include the reaction the partner has about the introductions. After all, you can tell a lot about someone by how they act when they meet new people. If you don’t want to take that chance, wait until you feel you know this person well enough to introduce them to other people who are important to you.
Many of our friends form opinions about our partner, whether we’re serious about the relationship or just testing the waters. This can go many ways, including the good, bad, and in between. In the instance of a bad judgement, you might find yourself being peer-pressured into an early end for this relationship. On the other hand, if your friends love your partner, you may feel obligated to stick around even if you’re not feeling the connection. This is another reason timing is important and making small introductions is beneficial.
Ultimately, when you’re introducing your partner to your friends, it’s because you’re confident in the relationship having some sort of success. If you’re not confident about that, it’s too early to make the introductions. Granted, early introductions could save you from investing too much time in a doomed relationship. But do you want to make that call or let the relationship play out on its own?
James Preece – Dating Coach for AsianSingleSolution.com
Our big Spring Fling Singles party takes place on Saturday 28th April.
Here are our top tips to make sure you make the most of the event and come away with lots of dates!
Most of our events have a dress code, so think about this in advance. Get your best shirt ironed or treat yourself to a new dress. That way you’ll be confident when you enter the event and will attract attention for the right reasons.
It’s always a great idea to round up your single friends to come along with you. That way you have an instant support group and you won’t have to worry about being left on your own. Just make sure you choose happy, positive friends who are there to have a good time!
If you haven’t got any single friends to bring then don’t worry – just go up and say hello to some of the guests. It doesn’t matter if you find them attractive or not. When you do this, other people will assume they are interested in you and you’ll look instantly more popular. As well as that, you could make new friends who you can keep talking to during the night.
We pride ourselves on booking more hosts than any other Asian singles party company. These hosts are the friendliest in the business and are there to help you. Don’t be afraid of speaking to one if you need assistance. They can help you talk to the person you’ve been eyeing up all evening, or explain how the night works. Their job is to make sure you have a good time so please make the most of them. They don’t bite!
If you want to be successful, you need to throw yourself into everything. This means taking part in the ice breaking activities, having a go at speed dating and generally making the most of it. It really doesn’t matter how well you do it, but it will help you relax and have fun. All the activities are there for your benefit and can help you start conversations with new people.
I find myself saying this a lot, but as a paying customer you can talk to anyone you wish. If someone else is with them, don’t worry. Just wait a few minutes and step in. The last thing you want to do is go home regretting you blew your chance to say hello. Even if they aren’t keen, you’ve not lost anything. You didn’t know them before the party and you don’t know them after. So there’s no risk involved.
Don’t forget to book your ticket HERE !
See you there,
James
On Friday we requested that our developers make a minor change to the website. This unfortunately, had knock on consequences in the iphone App causing it to crash unexpectedly.
Unfortunately, our developers do not work weekends so we were unable to contact them.
We emailed all our members to advise that you can gain full access to the service via the website until this issue is resolved.
I have now restored the system to overwrite the changes from Friday. The App may have cached the erroneous data causing it to malfunction. If you still experience an issue, please delete the App and reinstall it. There are still some intermittent issues. Ideally, please use the website version until Monday.
We will provide a further update on Monday once our tech team have had a look.
Apologies for the inconvenience.
AsianSingleSolution
You’ve probably heard of the dating term “ghosting.” It’s when you are seeing someone and you think all is going well, only for them to completely disappear. You’ll never see or hear from them again -just like a ghost.
Ghosting isn’t a new thing. It’s something that has always gone on, but it’s more obvious. In the age before emails and mobile phones it was much easier to avoid someone or hide from them. But now it’s obvious if someone stops responding. We’ve heard of some terrible ghosting stories and here are some of the worst.
1)
John and Heather had been together quite a while, but he was starting to wonder if she was into him as much as he was to her. He took her away from a weekend by the sea, expecting a romantic break. However, after dinner on the first night she went out to get some wine from a nearby shop. He returned to the hotel to meet her, only to discover she’d packed her bags and left.
2)
Not all ghosts are gone forever. We heard from one lady who told us about a man she’d been dated who had ended up ghosting her. She’s tried several times to reach out, but he blocked her from calling or seeing his social media accounts. Strangely, he popped back about a year later apologising and saying he’d been ill. She reluctantly agreed to give him another chance, only for the same things to happen. When he got in touch a few months later she decided enough was enough and blocked him instead.
3)
Sarah and Tim had been dating for 18th months and were talking about marriage. She told him he’d have to get her Dad’s permission first. He agreed but that was the last time she ever heard from him.
Sarah did her own investigating and discovered Tim had been in a relationship the whole time they were seeing each other.
4)
One lady went on a few dates with a man she’d met on a dating app. They ended up having a falling out when she refused to kiss him. She ghosted him and forgot all about him ….until she started a new job a few months later. It turned out her new boss was the same guy she’d disappeared on. Awkward!
5) This one is the worst ghosting story of all. Maria met a man in a bar and they hit it off. He was a very mysterious type with an air of “bad boy” about him that she found attractive. He always seemed to want to meet in bars and often went missing for a few days at a time. While he was nice enough to her, everyone else seemed a bit wary or him and her friends couldn’t stand him. Eventually he went missing for good. She only discovered the truth when she saw the front page of a local newspaper and found out he’s gone to prison for armed robbery.
If you don’t want to see someone again then it’s always better just to be honest with them. Let them know politely that you aren’t interested in seeing them again. That way they know they can get on with their lives and date other people.
Do you have a ghosting story of your own? If you do – let us know!
It’s no secret that having confidence is the best way to get ahead in life. Whether you’re talking about landing a promotion at work or finding that special someone. Confidence is the key to unlocking almost any doorway. But how do you fair when you don’t have any confidence? You can always learn how to be more confident. It takes time and consistency. You can take courses online or in person to help build your confidence. Or you can follow the old adage: Fake it until you make it. It’s a lot easier to fake your confidence. This can even help you to build real confidence in yourself. Let’s take a look at 5 ways you can appear more confident:
Many people who are nervous tend to talk a lot more than they should. Many others choose to be absolutely silent. These are two indications that someone lacks confidence in their life. Instead of doing either, learn when it’s appropriate to talk and when it’s best to listen. You don’t need to be the wallflower and you don’t need to babble nervously. When you choose to speak, make your voice heard. Be commanding and bold and always follow through on anything you say.
Another habit that nervous individuals have is excessive fidgeting. You need to learn to sit still. Now when most people think of fidgeting, they think of hand gestures. Fidgeting can also mean gently shaking your leg and even looking around the room excessively. Instead of allowing yourself these mindless actions, consciously make the effort to stop trying to distract yourself. That’s really what fidgeting is: Keeping your mind otherwise occupied because you’re nervous or anxious about the situation you’re in.
When it comes to talking to people you’re nervous around, it’s tempting to look in different directions. However, improving your confidence starts with making solid eye contact. This can be tricky to do initially, so pace yourself. Start by looking just over the shoulder of the person you’re talking to. This can make it appear as though you’re making eye contact. Then make the effort to look directly at the individual and try and maintain eye contact. You’ll find it comes naturally after a while.
Confident individuals always stand tall. This is both physically and mentally. By doing this, they tend to command the attention of the room. To stand tall physically means to stand with your shoulders straight, looking ahead and making direct eye contact. To stand tall mentally means to be proud of yourself and the things you’ve accomplished. If you don’t feel like you’ve accomplished anything, set your goals a little lower. You’re allowed to feel proud of getting out of bed in the morning if that’s all you’ve done. You don’t need to win awards to be validated.
The biggest way to appear confident is by not overdoing it. Whether you’re learning confidence or trying to fake it, you need to be realistic. This means that you can’t overexaggerate how confident you are. You can’t pretend to feel like you’re on top of the world. You need to maintain a balance between who you are and this person you’re trying to become. You don’t want to take on more than you can handle and then have people find out this isn’t who you are. So take baby steps until you feel confident to start taking leaps.
We’re all likely to see those happy couples. Whether out and about or people we know personally. They are always laughing and seem radiant, no matter how long they’ve been together. If you’re not in a relationship like that, it’s gets you thinking: what makes them so happy? What do those couples know that you don’t? Why can’t you be that happy with your partner? The good news is that you can. You can start today to build a relationship that will always flourish. You just have to learn the secrets behind happy couples.
One thing that these couples do is communicate effectively. They feel comfortable expressing their thoughts to one another. They don’t worry about the reception because they are open. Being open with your partner increases your likelihood of staying together. But communication is more than just talking about your problems. It also means that you’re listening to their problems. You’re responded to them in an effective manner. It’s often easy to jump into “defensive” mode when you’re feeling attacked. But you have to remember that expressing their feelings about something is not meant to be a direct attack on you.
Following an open communication, you have to learn to be supportive and understanding. This means that you’ll have to drop the defensive mechanisms you’ve learned over the years. You should never have to be defensive with a partner. Supporting each other also means giving each other space when it’s needed. Your partner could be having a hard time because of work or other personal issues. You can’t pressure them into talking or even being intimate. They shouldn’t pressure you either. You need to be able to give each other what is needed at the time.
Being attentive is a good way to give each other what is needed. This also means being observant enough to know what your partner might be looking for. Doing this is a great way to make your partner feel appreciated and understood. It’s easy to get so wrapped up in your own world that you forget to make time for each other. Please don’t confuse intimacy with sex. Being intimate with your partner doesn’t always mean sex. Although, a healthy sexual relationship is a key element to maintaing a thriving connection. Intimacy can be as simple as holding hands or cuddling on the couch. Sometimes silence and hand-holding is the best way to be attentive to someone’s needs.
One of the reasons someone feels underappreciated is because small things get taken out of context. This can lead to misunderstandings, which can lead to arguments. The original point gets completely lost in the heat of the moment and nothing gets resolved. It’s important to know which fights are worth having and when it’s time to step down. Knowing this can be the difference between a thriving relationship and a failing one. In order to know whether or not it’s important, you’ll have to follow the steps above in being attentive and communicating effectively. You need to stay focused during any disagreement so that the problem actually gets resolved and doesn’t need to come up again in the future.
Finally, happy couples are the ones who can laugh off unimportant arguments. Learning to laugh with your partner is beneficial is so many ways. Firstly, laughter is a health boost. But it also signals that your love for each other is more important than petty problems. Laughing alone makes you seem inconsiderate and like you don’t care, but laughing together signals a oneness. Every relationship should have that oneness.
That’s not to say you’ll always be on the same page. These couples aren’t happy 24-7. They argue. They disagree. But they know how to communicate and work things through. That’s how happy couples stay happy.
2018 is already racing quickly by, but the good news is our Valentine’s parties are coming up soon.
These parties are the highlight of our dating calendar and always attract lots of new people. We aim to make them as fun as possible and always provide much more than similar dating events.
Both events will take place on Saturday 10th February 2018, which is just a few days before the big day itself.
The London party will be at our favourites and most popular venue, the Holiday Inn Kensington. We’ve got live classical music, optional speed dating, chocolate fountain and much more.
For Birmingham, we have a glamorous new venue – Siamais – which has only just opened up. Discounted “Love Potion” cocktails for the first to arrive.
If you’d like to come then don’t wait any longer as the price will go up and you risk it going to a waiting list.
CLICK HERE to find out more and book now.
Meera
At the start of the new year, everyone likes to make a fresh start. It’s when we decide we’ll start taking action and do something dramatic to achieve one particular goal in life.
For some, this might be to lose weight. For others it could be to find a new job or quit smoking. However, lots of people will also want to meet their perfect partner. I’m guessing that’s why you are reading this blog on our site in the first place. The good news is that you’ve come to the right place as we can definitely provide you with the tools to help you. It’s now just a case of you keeping things going and making a start.
Here are some quick suggestions to help you on your way:
First of all, let all your friends and family know you are looking for a partner. Write it on social media and let the world know what you are up to. Put a note on your fridge about the person you are going to meet. That way you are making a declaration that you are finally doing this. Your support circle will be able to help and keep you motivated. More that anything, you’ll become accountable.
The next thing you must do is get your online dating profile ready. Update it with new content and recent photos. Make sure it’s the best advert for you and that you are going to stand out from the competition. Your profile is there to attract new people to you even when you aren’t logged in, so make it count.
If you want to be successful, you are going to have to leave the house. Do everything possible to get yourself in a position where you’ll meet new people. We run lots of very popular events that will provide you with this opportunity. Book one now and you are going to dramatically boost your chances. Tell your friends but don’t worry if you come on your own as we have wonderful friendly hosts to look after you.
Do go out on dates, even if you aren’t completely sure about them. If there is even a glimmer of interest then spend an hour or so with them over coffee. There’s nothing to lose and the more dates you go on then the better you’ll become. You won’t be nervous anymore.
Nothing worth getting is ever going to be easy. You’ll experience knock-backs along the way but you have to keep up the momentum. You won’t like everyone you meet but all it takes is one person. Don’t give up before you even start as it can take several months to get what you truly desire.
So what are you waiting for? You owe it to yourself to start taking action. Once you do, you’ll be so happy that you got started. You’ll be that little bit closer to a happy, fulfilling relationship.
Happy dating and good luck!
James Preece
Dating Coach for Asiansinglesolution.com
We ran a very popular competition in December to win a £250 Shopping Spree.
We are very pleased to announce the winner was Dhilen Patel who has now received his £250 Selfridges voucher.
Thank you very much to everyone who entered and watch out for the next competition soon!
