Archive for July, 2011

Sounds good?

Monday, July 25th, 2011

Your voice is one of your most important dating tools

But are you using it to your advantage?

Our voices are something we all take for granted and therefore we don’t give them much thought.  But you really need to be aware of how you sound.

I’ve known people to get lots of interest via online dating but then completely blow it when they start speaking on the telephone.

1)  Record your voice and play it back.  Most mobile phones will have a facility to do this. Many people are surprised as to what they sound like as we hear things differently to the way other people do. This is all because of the way sound echoes and resonates in your head.

2) Pay attention to the way you sound.  Are you speaking too softly, loudly, fast or mumbling?  The slower and clearer you speak then the better you’ll come across.  Succesful people always leave people hanging on their next word.

3) Copy someone you know.  This can be a film star, politician or a tv personality.  Find someone that you know members of the opposite sex find attractive.  For example, Sean Connery and Mariella Frostrup are two very popular voices.  When you’ve worked out who you want to sound out then listen to them as much as you can.  Take what you like and discard the rest.

4) Perfect it!     Pick up a newspaper or a book and practice reading it out loud.   Try to do it slowly and make it interesting. Imagine you are reading to someone you are attracted to. Paint pictures with your words and you’ll soon be able to do this naturally.

5) Use it.   Once you’ve mastered the technique then use it as much as you.  This can be on the phone to sales people, in supermarkets or anytime you want to stand out.


Good luck!

James Preece – The Dating Guru

Do you stand out from the crowd?

Monday, July 18th, 2011

If you want to succeed in dating you need to stand out.

But just make sure it’s not for the wrong reasons!

Online dating sites, like the Asian Single Solution, are filled with thousands and thousands of members.  They are so spoilt for choice that it can sometimes all the profiles can seem to blend into one.  Otherwise you won’t get noticed and you won’t meet anyone.  So you’ll need to work hard to make sure you get seen.

The trouble is, some people stand out but they just don’t realise it.

You might think that adding a photo of you looking “cool” in sunglasses, posing with a group of models or looking mean and moody will get you messages.  The truth is that this rarely works.  No, girls don’t want to see you standing next to a car and no, men don’t want to see you falling over drunk with a cocktail in your hand.

THIS about the message and image you are portraying. Do you want to be seen as warm, friendly, happy and good dating material?  Then smile in your photo and you’ll be seen as all those things.

Be careful with what you write in your profile too.  Don’t go on about negative things or talk about the things you don’t want. You’ll come across as a whiner and will quickly get crossed off any favourites lists.

Spelling mistakes, text talk and bad grammar just make you look like a loser who can’t be bothered to write properly.

The golden rule is to be make sure you are proactive.  No matter how good ( or bad!) your profile is, if you aren’t sending out messages to the people you are interested in then you won’t get results.  They’ll just never find you.

Top Tip: Log in every day and you’ll be listed at the stop of searches. This is the best way to get noticed.


Happy dating,

James Preece – The Dating Guru

Avoiding Online Dating Cliches

Tuesday, July 12th, 2011

Many people keep writing the same dull things in their profiles.

So today I’ll tell you what to avoid.

Every week I get to see thousands of new profile and it’s odd how many all say exactly the same thing.  In this blog I’ll reveal the most common things I see , in the hope you won’t write the same thing.  These are five of the most common Online Dating Cliches that people write:

1) “I don’t know what I’m doing on an online dating site.”  This just makes you sound arrogant. By writing this you are suggesting that you are far too good to be on the site and what a hardship it is.  As well as this you are insulting every other member on there too!

2) “I don’t know what write” or “I’m not sure what to say.”   So you are indecisive and boring right?   Of course you aren’t….so never write this.  Instead carefully write something that will peak their interest and make you sound like someone they’d like to meet.  Work out what’s special about you and tell the world.

3) “My friends and family are important to me.”  Isn’t this really just stating the obvious? Friends and family are important to everyone.  It would be much more worrying and abnormal if they weren’t!

4) “No time wasters/ players/ etc”     This gives the impression that you’ve had some bad experiences in the past and are therefore judging all people before you’ve given them a chance. It’s doubtful that anyone would ever admit to being a time waster anyway.

5) “I’m open minded”   While most people write this with the intention that they have no expectations when it comes to dating, the reality is that it comes across as if you looking for a casual relationship.


Try and be a bit more creative, and you’ll have a dynamic , interesting profile that will help you stand out from all the other singles.

Good luck,

James Preece – The Dating Guru

Your halfway dating review

Monday, July 4th, 2011


Can you believe that it’s nearer 2012 than the start of 2011?

It’s a great time to reflect on your dating goals.

So how have things been going for you?  If you’ve not had many dates then it’s not too late to do something about it.  The first step is just to take action.

As we head towards the Summer you’ll discover it’s actually a fantastic time to meet people.

The weather is generally warmer, the nights are longer and people are often in a “holiday” frame of mind.  This means they are more relaxed, sociable and open to dating.

So here are some great ways you can boost your dating.  They are all easy enough to do if only you set aside the time to make the happen.

1) Online Dating.  These online dating sites get a big increase in traffic over the Summer as more people are actively searching for someone to spend the long nights with.  Take a little time to work on your profile and start contacting anyone that takes your interest.

2) Get a new outfit.  You’ll want to look your best, so why not go out and update your summer wardrobe.  Ask a friend of the opposite sex to go shopping with you, so you can find out they might find attractive.

3) Meet up with your friends.    Why not arrange a picnic, walk or BBQ with your closest friends?  You could ask everyone to bring someone new so you’ll end up meeting lots of new people. Even if they aren’t suitable for you to date they might know some perfect contacts who are.

4) Try some Summer Events and Festivals.  There are many open air events this time of year and everyone will be in a great mood.  This can be melas, film screenings, concerts or even one of our very own Asian Single Solution Singles parties.


Good luck!

James Preece – The Dating Guru